Well, I’m hooked. I tried Diet Mountain Dew Code Red this week and I like it a lot.

House on touse

We have a closing date on the house. It’s Monday, 17 November. It would have been earlier — like next week — but I will be out of town next week teaching a class in Atlanta.

Incidentally, 17 November is the last day we can close on the house. When HUD accepted our offer on this house, they informed us we had no more than 45 days to close on the house. The 45th day is 17 November.

Fortunately, HUD will have all their stuff signed and finished by then. We’ll just have to sign our stuff and the transaction will be done.

So... the day approaches.

Some pictures!

It’s picture time!

Eli shares recliner space with some other babies.	Eli dons his holiday cheer.	Lucy hosts an impromptu party and invites some local babies.
	Maya shows off the black cat she had painted on her face at a Halloween party.

Matrix Revolutions

Christine and I went and saw the third installment in The Matrix triology tonight on it’s opening night. It was nice to go to a movie again. Christine and I haven’t been to a movie in a long, long time and this is one we’d both been looking forward to seeing.

Visually, I thought the film was superior to the previous two. I wanted to watch it in slow-motion to really absorb and appreciate the detailed special effects. I was dismayed there weren’t any of the realistic action scenes (which take place in the matrix itself) like there were in the other two films. No car chases. No playground brawls.

Overall, I’d say I was disappointed with the ending of the trilogy. I’m disappointed with how the story ended up. It almost feels like the Wachowski brothers gave up on trying to tie things up in the end.

But, it was worth the matinee price.

Hecticity Permeability

Smoochy*’s been gone since Monday morning. I think he’s been back to the house every day since then, though, to pick up more stuff like clothes, pick up his mail, and bring his computer back so I could copy stuff off of it for Jennie.

The longer Smoochy*’s gone, the more Jennie, Christine, and I realize he’s been spinning everyone a web of lies. The scary thing is nobody really thinks it’s a deliberate thing. It’s just how Smoochy* is. I can attest to that. He’s always been prone to exaggerate about everything, but lately his exaggerations have been outlandish and some outright lies have surfaced.

For example, Sunday night, when Smoochy* and I had words and I asked him to just stop talking to Jennie about their relationship and their issues, I confronted Smoochy* about a document Jennie had run across on their computer in which Smoochy* had created a detailed list of things about Jennie he didn’t like. I told Smoochy* I was really shocked about this because that just didn’t seem like a healthy thing a husband should be doing — dwelling on things that bug him about his wife.

Smoochy* responded saying that his church bishop asked him to compile that list and that it was none of my business what was in it. I looked at him in disbelief because I could not believe his eccliastical leader would suggest or request such an action.

On Monday, Jennie actually outright asked the bishop if he had made such a request of Smoochy* and he said had never asked Smoochy* to do such a thing.

This is just an example of the countless lies, exaggerations, and deceptions Jennie’s had to deal with. The more Jennie learns of these lies, the less likely she is to hope for reconciliation.

Ironically, Smoochy* insists it is he that is the victim of falsehoods. Of course, he also insists Jennie is insane, mentally unbalanced, mean, unforgiving, and deceitful.

We asked Smoochy*’s dad to act as a mediator between Smoochy* and Jennie because the e-mail exchanged between them was getting inflammatory and overly emotional, but I think either he didn’t understand what we were asking him or he was just too bothered by what was going on to really do it well.

The idea was that a mediator could filter the messages passed back and forth to ensure that only non-inflammatory, fact-based messages were being exchanged. This would include messages like, “You received a package today. I put it by the front door,” or “I deposited a check in X account yesterday.”

Anything more emotional than this is likely to cause problems.

Today, for example, Jennie sent this message to Smoochy* (via Smoochy*’s dad):

Please let Smoochy* know that BigO Tires called and his tires are in. Also,
Steve & Anne called last night, and wanted Smoochy* to know that he is welcome 
to stay with them, they would like him to call them.

Also, just let him know for me, that I do love him. And I do hope that we   
can work through things.

Now, I think Jennie did a fairly good job of being factual and diplomatic here. However, if I were mediating, I would have eliminated the second paragraph altogether. While it’s a nice sentiment and it shows that Jennie is trying to be optimistic, it could trigger negative reaction.

Well, Smoochy*’s response came through verbatim and included the following paragraphs:

Please let Jennie know that I already told her that I wouldn't be staying  
with anyone. I'm going to live in a place at least as nice as the house 
even if not as large. It's better that we both live in something that 
isn't a hole in the wall, even if we have to sell the house. Do you 
honestly think I'm going to be forking out huge money for the house while 
living in a crack in the sidewalk? Not going to happen, let's sell the 
house. We have a lot of bills and it's the only way I can manage to pay 
for everything. 

...

Due to Jennie's anxiety problems I understand that we have to do this 
go-between stuff. It might be a lot easier on everyone, including 
Jennie, if the doctors would just double the dosage of Paxil. This must be 
looked into. Others who are on Paxil and know Jennie are recommending it. 
They say here dose is just too small and that it won't do much.

Without criticizing Smoochy*’s funky logic, it’s interesting to note that he plainly does not understand why a mediator was requested as he continues to lob inflammatory insults at Jennie saying she has anxiety and depression problems that are affecting “everyone.”

I don’t know what’s going to happen here. I’d like to think Smoochy* and Jennie can work this out, but it seems like Smoochy* continues to dig himself a deeper whole every time he opens his mouth or sends e-mail and, historically, he’s far too proud to admit he’s wrong and take back the things he’s said.

In fact, when Jennie asked him to apologize to her for swearing at her a few weeks ago, he eventually apologized for getting upset but disclaimed his apology to include that it didn’t cover what was actually said — he actually meant those words.

One of my good friends commented that it seemed like Smoochy* was acting like he had a brain tumor or something. He asked me if I thought Smoochy* was seeing another woman — if that could explain his behavior. I told him the brain tumor theory was probably much more likely. Who knows? Who knows if we’ll ever know what’s going on in his mind?